I got up late this morning and didn’t have time to wash my hair. After a quick assessment, I pulled it back and threw it in a loose bun. Hmm...totally acceptable! Actually, I kind of like it!
Done and done. I head downstairs and wake the kids.
I’m making my fourth egg sandwich of the morning when I feel someone lightly touch my new hair-do from behind. “Oh, you’ve got a cute little bun this morning!” my 15-year-old daughter exclaims.
I turn to greet my lovely girl and reflexively reply, “Yeah, what do ya think?”
She tilts her head and ponders. The pause tells me what’s coming. She squints a bit and scrunches her nose. With a shake of her head she makes her ruling: “Not good.”
Ha! There’s nothing like the perspective of one’s teenage daughter! She yammers on about how it makes me look old because it highlights my grey hair, and continues with how she found this age-guessing app and she put my picture in and it guessed that I that I was only 35! Isn't that great?
Oh, I’m so glad, my darling! I roll my eyes and finish serving all of these people that I have created. I go through the rest of the morning motions, but can’t help but peek at myself in the mirror when I pass by. It’s only a flicker, but the thoughts are there:
Can I really wear my hair like this? Maybe I am too old?
It happens so quickly, this self-doubt thing. It’s sneaky and insidious. My work is to squelch it before it takes root, so I use the simplest tools I have: my breath and my oils.
I grab one of my favorites: Bergamot. I crack it open and take a sniff...yum. A few drops go in my palm and over my heart. I take a few seconds to close my eyes and breathe. Ah, yes...that’s better. I glance at myself one more time and smile. Yep, I’m going with the mom bun, dammit.
We head to the car and drive to school. I get a kiss from the boys and my girl offers her forehead. Before she can resist, I pull her close and squeeze her tight, making sure to leave some Bergamot on her back.
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